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Be The Hole

by Gitai

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1.
Warm 04:18
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Warm Is the color of the sun Is the color of the rest you'll find Underneath the sink Coarse Is the feeling of your skin Stretching over your papery Fingers and veins I don't wanna be pressured to go to bed I can't find the right motion in my head I feel myself crackle every time it's heard I'm fragile, can't take the pain for what it's worth Far In a future ahead I am banging my head against A feeling so remote I am one One against time But I never was one to question it People say it fits all the time It's all a part Part of what you would say If you were here today I don't know what you'd think of me Because I love you but I am not who you want me to be Ooh -- I don't wanna be pressured to go to bed I can't find the right motion in my head I feel myself crackle every time it's heard I'm fragile, can't take the pain for what it's worth I'm out for a walk if you stop by and I'm not there I'm growing nails so I can properly pull my hair The cut on my finger burns a light like I'm gonna die But what is that worth if I cannot free my mind?
2.
Another Mystery 02:47
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Paralyzed as I was When you picked up my call All the years behind us Surprised you came at all Where have I been? I’ve been fine, this and that, and you? Oh, you know that and this, well Every new day leads to Another mystery Another mystery Give your ticket to the man Take this dance with me We will rise above The chaos in the sea Never mind these lies Take in my life as you are No matter the distance between us You stay my shining star You are a mystery You are a mystery You are a mystery to me
3.
Do You Know 03:43
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A few months ago I hit you up What a nice surprise At your bedside I will never show My bad side to you now Don’t let it rot Don’t watch the pot My blood’ll boil Popcorn goes pop The oil is hot Stand back now A few months from now You’ll call me up Don’t be surprised I’ve got shaky luck I am wondering If you mean it Could I lean on this? And do you know what you want? Do you know what you want Do you know (Now I know)
4.
Bullride 04:28
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Facedown in the paint again Felt sentimental in front of my friends Now everybody’s laughing like they know What’s there to talk about? Slipped into my ways again Funny feeling when you can’t pretend Red hot daggers slide through my spine Split it like butter Oh Oh no Not here I don’t really wanna talk about it Spent all morning getting by around it Recollection is the only thing you know Calm down your little noggin Never sure is how to feel about the Creeping feeling coming back around, ain’t No connection to the people that I see Bullride through their sincerity They’re paid off to drink and coddle me Won’t be the hole inside of me Fear the white American He interrupts to take a sip from my jerrycan Got you motherfucker that’s gasoline What shall we do about that? Burn down every way-over that I cross Never met a parallel I didn’t toss Heaps of trash in the ocean where I’m stuck With my anxiety But oh I feel I’m scared, too And I don’t really wanna talk about it Your feelings just don’t got that ring around ‘em Well if you stick around, I’d love to talk about mine Won’t you stay for a while Never sure is how to feel about the Creeping feeling coming back around, ain’t No connection to the people that I see Bullride through their sincerity They’re paid off to drink and coddle me Won’t be the hole inside of me I won’t know when I’ll be free When some god has pitted me Against their sincerity
5.
Slow Retreat 04:37
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I retreat so slowly now I was wondering how I did it, anyhow I draw the line so thin these days So I can succumb you Watch you fall in my place Fall in the sun It’s okay to wanna be no one I made a choice Wouldn’t ever wanna marry that voice I thought I told you so I was getting sucked in Keeps the birdman fat Keeps him pondering How was I okay with losing that spark I feel jealous, lonely In the dark I fall in Linked up to a face I will never be strong enough to leave this place Fall in the sun It’s okay to wanna be no one I made a face I don’t ever wanna be in that place again because I walked into a mess A package I would rather not address I thought that you knew But it always comes to be untrue I thought I told you So — I fall into the sun I will talk bad back to no one Everything has been overdone Boy you’ve come to the end of your run
6.
EHT 04:34
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Everything happens today It happens for a reason, it’s okay It happens for a reason, that’s the key It’s gonna be okay A lot’s been going on A lot’s been raining down on this parade I’m wearing black lead eyeliner And leather crochet Thoughts and turnarounds Got me feeling knocked back, fallen down I’m thinking of all the years You had to leave behind Under a traffic light We make like it’s the dead of night And all the confusing things You had to bring to light Until the end of time Before the crack of dawn We think about the real things going on We’re so constructive, we’re so invisible We don’t know how You did it with no help Now don’t you feel so good about yourself But there’s that one thing you overlooked And it’s giving you hell I keep falling off the cliff Something about it seemed so attractive Maybe today is the last day we painted it Thoughts and turnarounds Got me feeling knocked back, fallen down I’m thinking of all the years You had to leave behind Under a traffic light I can tell you think I’ve been way too uptight Stop saying confusing things You know I think you’re right You’re right It’s nice to feel right Pull over here you know I think that you’re right Ooh, falling off the edge of you Falling off the edge of nothing that is new Things you wish could be untrue Don’t you know that nothing Don’t you know that nothing moves Unless you want it to It’s harder to convince me But you do
7.
On & On 03:53
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I don’t trust you with your blinking eyes I don’t need you taking me by surprise On and longing Why am I so in ties On and on and on And I find no one
8.
On Tour 02:57
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Friends are going on tour I’ma just go to bed The fire is raging outside Smoke is getting through to my head In my head I don’t know What you do for me Do you feel some resentment Dog-earing this page Something putting you out of tune With the slowness of your age Of your age you’re not satisfied What comes next In this bone you picked with happiness And your unrest Keeps you up so very late at night My dear Keeps you up so I can’t recognize What you do for me And in your head such a lonely voice Calls to you Through the night and through the emptiness Bulletproof As you are, as you may try to be Don’t step out of view And in my head I try to understand What is true And what good you do for me
9.
Jealous 04:50
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I’m too fucking jealous Born with the tide With the time Hear you drawing down your blinds As I do mine I sweep and shine Fall back in bed again, but Now when I wake up Nothing’s changed People fall in their old ways And I’m the same Full of chalk Floating on chalk clouds of love Live with your debt And your regrets I’ve worn them at the top of my mind Too many times Now I’m worn out From giving love to strangers Found on a walk A cigar box I’ll put my tender heart inside Nothing to see No one but me Can walk me through these clouds of love I feel love Done with this ride I’ll be inside If you don’t see me you know why I’ve cracked and cried Been stirred like soup And spat out on the counter I’m too hot to swallow I’m too cold to hold I’m finding that I need my friends More than I know Or so I’m told Happiness can’t find me when I’m too fucking jealous
10.
Skip Town 03:56
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When you skip town Forget the streets that brought you down I’ll be right here Trade you my whiskey for your beer She’s so naive Buys any trick you got up your sleeve And you do no wrong Hit your note, you sing your song And she’s singing hers These days, they melt away like summer Melting coffee flavored Ice cream, I can’t taste it without sugar Ancient pain makes me go numb Wouldn’t trade for anyone’s Are you still there? New city drowning out old cares On the rebound Roll call to see who’s still around Jonny distills Ryan stays out late for the thrills And I tag along Trade some substance for the song These days, they make you chase the pain like summer Chase that other bummer But that pill won’t make us any younger Ancient pain I’ve overcome Makes my face go totally numb But I wouldn’t trade for anyone’s When you skip town Forget the streets that brought you down I’ll be right here Trying my best to be sincere But ain’t no family left here
11.
Waltz 05:16
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I saw impossible leaves Age does not apply I thought if I spread my wings I could surely fly But nothing’s ever an escape, a fall Describe the days with words Your friends you call An apple is the eye of thread That’s all, it’s all Friends come, friends go, friends leave It doesn’t matter in the end I soiled all my dumplings And it felt like sand The rash I get it doesn’t go away I like to picture painful things, it’s okay His tender hands against the girl And they’re in love I thought I told you I mean I thought I clarified I saw you walking slowly With your shoes untied Wanted to tell you but it was late at night And that’s the time, yeah that’s the place we fight A place where I can sing my song, my plight I would’ve said I had enough of it But judgement is a test of punishment I’m bracing it but it is so damn tough I’ve got compassion but it’s not enough Not enough

about

Songs and lyrics by Gitai Vinshtok
Recorded at The Shack in Reseda, CA
Produced and mixed by Gitai Vinshtok
Mastered by Joel Gardella, except track 6 mastered by Gitai Vinshtok

credits

released November 11, 2022

Sam Wardlaw - drums, tracks 1, 4, 5, 6, 9, 11
Cristobal Cruz-Garcia - cello, tracks 3 and 8
Tony Tirador - synth, track 5

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Gitai Los Angeles, California

I'm Gitai
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